10:30 a.m. – 2:30 p.m.: Mandapam ceremony at Dwarakapuri Hall, ISKCON Complex
Note: The Kerala Malabar Menon/Nair marriage ceremony is a short and simple one. So don't be late to the venue!
DRESS CODE
Jalahalli Temple
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Groom
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White kasava mundu and
mel mundu (upper garment)
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Men in the immediate
family
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White kasava mundu and mel
mundu/ shirt/ kurta
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Other men
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Unlike temples in Kerala where men can only wear a mundu and mel mundu, the Jalahalli temple allows any conservative dress. So while a mundu and shirt would be nice, shirt and trousers or pyjama and kurta is perfectly fine.
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Ladies in the immediate family
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Kerala sari
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Other ladies
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Sari - Kerala/ Kanjeevaram/ others
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ISKCON
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Groom and men in the
immediate family
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White kasava mundu and
full-sleeved shirt/kutra
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Other men
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Any festive dress
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Ladies
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Any festive dress. Silk saris are the norm.
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THALI CEREMONY AT AYYAPPAN TEMPLE, JALAHALLI
Arrive at the temple at least half an hour before the muhurtham time. The temple ceremony is a simple one in front of Lord Vishnu and is supervised by a temple official/priest.
The thali is given to the priest for ‘thali puja’ and taken back.
The marriage area is decorated with a nirapara (small wooden barrel called para filled to the brim with paddy and decorated with coconut tree flowers) and nilavilakku (lamp). This symbolises a prayer for prosperity.
The groom’s father gives him the thali after praying for the couple’s well being.
The groom ties the thali around the bride’s neck at the muhurtham time. The groom’s sister, standing behind the bride, helps to tie the thali properly.
Now the bride and groom stand facing each other. The bride’s father gives her a garland made of tulsi leaves and flowers and she garlands the groom. Likewise, the groom’s father gives him a garland and he garlands the bride.
Next, the groom takes the bride’s hand and they do a pradakshina of the temple and offer prayers.
This completes the thali ceremony. The party then proceeds in a bus to the ISKCON mandapam to freshen up and change. Breakfast will be arranged.
MANDAPAM CEREMONY AT DWARAKAPURI HALL, ISKCON
Guests are requested to arrive well before the muhurtham time. As they arrive, they are greeted at the entrance of the hall with sprinkled rose water, chandanam (sandalwood paste) and kumkum.
Receiving the groom
About 30 minutes before the muhurtham time, the groom and a small party of his immediate family members assemble at the entrance arch.
Simultaneously, the brass oil lamps at the mandapam are lit and the stage is set. The stage will have nirapara, nilavillaku, and trays with auspicious items like changala vatta (chain lamp), ashta mangalyam, etc.
Once the stage is set, the bride’s party moves towards the groom’s party to receive them with thalapoli.
The bride’s younger brother (or equivalent) welcomes the groom by washing his feet on a peedham (wooden plank) and garlanding him. A towel is provided for drying the feet.
The groom’s party is then escorted to the mandapam with a thalapoli. The thalapoli is led by the bride’s maternal aunt holding the changala vatta (sacred oil lamp), while another aunt carries the ashtamangalyam (eight auspicious articles). The girls following the first two carry thalams (plates) containing rice, flowers, oil lamp, and vishari (kasavu cloth arranged as a fan).
The thalappoli is accompanied by a Nadaswara melam.
Entering the mandapam
Just before entering the mandapam, the groom greets the invitees with a namaskaram (folded hands) and bows to the lamp. The groom’s father/parents lead him to the mandapam. The groom enters with his right foot and sits at the peedham (wooden plank) provided there leaving space on his left for the bride.
Note: Only the groom and his immediate family (parents and siblings and their spouses) get on the stage to avoid a crowd.
Simultaneously, the groom’s family arranges the podava (saris) in a tray to be given to the bride after the exchange of garlands.
Here comes the bride
Now the bride’s parents escort her from the entrance to the mandapam accompanied by the thalapoli and nadaswara melam.
Before entering the mandapam, the bride also greets the invitees with a namaskaram and bows to the lamp. The bride’s parents then lead her to the mandapam. She enters with her right foot and takes her seat to the left of the groom on the peedham.
WEDDING
Maala kettal
Since the thali tying ceremony was done privately in the temple, we will repeat the process for the invitees but with a normal gold chain. The groom’s father gives him a gold chain (given to groom’s parents beforehand). The groom ties the chain around the bride’s neck, at the muhurtham time accompanied by nadaswaram getti melam. The groom’s sister, standing behind the bride, helps to tie the chain properly.
Garland exchange
Now the bride and groom stand facing each other. The bride takes the wedding garland from her father and garlands the groom. Likewise, the groom takes the garland from his father and garlands the bride.
Ring exchange
Next, the bride takes the wedding ring from her father and puts it on the groom’s right ring finger. Likewise, the groom takes the wedding ring from his father and puts it on the bride’s ring finger.
Podava kodukal
Now the groom takes the tray containing the podava (saris) from his father and hands it to the bride. This signifies that the groom will henceforth provide for the bride.
Kanyadanam
Next, the bride’s father places a thamboolam (betel leaf and arecanut) in the right palm of the groom and places the right hand of the bride on top of it. This is the kanyadanam. Skip this step you think it is inappropriate for a daughter to be "given away" by the father to the husband..
Pradakshina
Holding hands the couple now walk around the mandapam three times and then resume their places.
Milk and plantain
The couple are now given milk and plantain fruit, first by the bride’s mother and followed by the immediate family and elders.
At this point, any elders who were unable to be present during the dakshina ceremony of the previous day can be escorted to the stage to give their blessing to the couple. Photographs can be taken.
This completes the ceremony. The couple now pose for photographs with the invitees and proceed for sadya.
For the Sadya menu, click here.
